The school gave us two weeks vacation for Christmas, much needed. However, 'perfect' would be something more like a 3-day weekend, every weekend. Teaching is really sucking it out of me. I leave nearly every day feeling overwhelmed, inadequate, and worried that the kids aren't learning a thing. I get home only to realize there is still a lot of cutting, gluing, and planning to do. Sometimes, in order to protect my own sanity, I decide to leave my bag in the corner for the night, relax, and not think a word about school.
Getting off the plane, a beautiful blanket of snow greeted me (and almost prevented me from getting home at all) - exactly what I wanted to experience in contrast to months of sweaty skin and unbearable nights after my fan broke. I could sleep under layers of down, wear warm fuzzy sweaters and even double socks if I wanted to.
Going home was the best thing for me, mentally. It was wonderful to see my family and a few good friends. When I walked into the house where I had babysat throughout college, it surprised me a little when that place felt like home... with 2 little boys attacking me with kisses and misses. I had spent so much time there.
I used one day to visit a 1st grade class, which I left thinking "oooohhh so THIS is how it should be done," and feeling super excited for all of the new ideas the teacher had sparked in my mind. I even stopped to see my own 1st grade teacher, so great.
I came back to Roatan feeling refreshed and grateful for the chance for a new start. I brought back with me a lot of books to copy from, activities, ideas, and prizes for my class.
I also came back to the island to find that the number of students in my class had grown and I had lost my assistant.
In this new year I refuse to give in to my stress. It is not in my character to give up, but it is a pattern of mine to begin to do things half-heartedly. Not a good idea when now my decisions affect 23 people, not just myself.
